Alice's daily gems

First greeting after I'd returned from a 3-day trip: "Do you want to see what we did in music & movement time at school? It's called the Boogie Walk. Doesn't that sound like 'booger'? But Devynn and Caitlin wouldn't hold my hand."

Well, kid, you bring up boogers and people start getting finicky about hand-holding...

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"Daddy, would you give me a hand? My diaper is giving me fits."

Should people who talk about things "giving them fits" still be in diapers?

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Morning greeting, in response to a kiss: "Your breath stinks. But your mommy milk smells delicious."

 "Mommy, please turn on the head-over light."

We're at a pizza place for dinner and on the other side of the restaurant someone we can't see is talking in a shrill, parrot-like voice. Intent on coloring the placemat, Alice just shakes her head and muses, "What a heck?"

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Addendum: Tonight we did the grace in which we go around and each person says one thing they're thankful for.

Edith: "Thank you that Alice does not rule the world."

Which should give you an idea of our preschooler's appetite for command.